Tommy - The Trials and Tribulations of a Girl? - Chapter 19

As we usually did on Saturday, Amy and I slept in. Amy’s dad had gone to play golf and we were up just before he came back home. And we ate lunch with her mom and dad. Then her mother put us to work. With their bridge club coming this evening, the house needed to be cleaned. They usually played bridge in the basement rec room, so we spent time cleaning in there. Then we helped give the rest of the house a cleaning, and since it wasn't very dirty, so it didn't take long.

When we'd finished, Amy's mother said, “You girls have been a big help. I would have been at it all day without your help. It's gotten warm, so why don't you go for a swim?”

“Sounds like a good idea mom.”, Amy replied.

I looked at Amy, and said, “I don't have a swimsuit.”

“The pool is very private. We could skinny dip.”

“Amy!”, her mother said.

“Sorry, mom. Honey, I have a couple of swimsuits that should fit you.”

I wasn't sure about this, and said, “I ... I don't know.”

“Honey. Why?”

“I may be Tammy. But remember the body is Tom's.”

“Hmm. I do have a cute red two-piece with white polka dots, and it has an attached skirt that just might work.”

“My forms?”

“The top is tight and should hold them, or just don't use them. Besides I'm the only one that will see you.”

“Maybe. ... Okay. Let's try it.”

Amy and I went up to her room, and she dug through her chest of drawers. Eventually, she pulled out two swimsuits. One was the red polka dot two-piece, and the other was a blue bikini. As she handed me the bikini, she grinned, and said, “Try this one.”

“No way. It's too skimpy even for you.”

“Chicken. You'd look good in it.”

“Just give me the red one. I'm still not sure about even wearing it.”

She handed me the red one with white polka dots, and said, “I wouldn't wear the padded panties. If the pads absorb water, they'd never dry before tonight.”

“How am I going to hide everything.”

“Hmm. Maybe a tight pair of regular panties or ... “

She walked over to her chest of drawers and went digging again. When she turned around, she had a pair of panties in one hand and a thong in the other. And she said, “Here's a pair of tight panties and a thong. Your choice.”

I took and looked at them. Then I set them on her bed and stripped out of my clothes. I slipped the panties up my legs, adjusted some things, and pulled the panties up tight. I looked at Amy, and asked, “Well?”

“Not bad.”, Amy replied. “I think the little skirt on the bottoms will help the look.”

I picked up the bottoms of the two-piece suit, stepped into them, and pulled them up. Amy smiled and just nodded yes. Putting the top on was easy because it was almost like a bra. It had a strap that went around my chest and another that went from the cups and around my neck. Both tied in a bow. Once I had it on, I picked up my forms and slipped them into the cups. And looking in the mirror, it didn't look bad.

I turned, looked at Amy, she smiled, and said, “Cute.”

Amy then undressed and slipped on the bikini. Now that is cute.

We then grabbed a couple of large towels and headed downstairs. As we walked into the kitchen on the way to the pool, Amy's mother saw us, and said, “Cute look Tammy.”

“Thanks, mom.”, I replied.

Then Amy's mother said, “Tammy. I think that Amy’s dad just might be seeing who you are.”

“I kind of had that feeling yesterday.”, I replied. “He just seemed to be more at ease with me.”

“He was. He even told me that it was fun to have you around. And that he finally realizes that this is just part of who you are.”

I just smiled.

“Girls. Don't forget bathing caps. There should be a couple in the bathroom off of the rec room.”

Amy and I went down to the rec room, and to the bathroom. Amy dug through the vanity drawers and found two bathing caps. She put hers one on with ease. Then she handed me the other bathing cap, I put it on and struggled to try to get all of my hair under it. Finally, Amy had to help me, and we were finally able to push all of my hair under the cap.

We walked out to the pool through sliding doors and set our towels down. I grabbed Amy and pulled her into the pool with me. This started a friendly water fight that ended with a kiss. We spent about a half an hour in swimming, then laid out on the pool chairs getting some sun.

Later as we walked into the house, we saw Amy's mother, and she said, “Your father is going to go after pizza in a little while, so you have about an hour to get cleaned up.”

Amy and I went up to her room, and we took turns in the shower. Both of us trying to keep our hair dry. Amy took her shower first, and as she came out, I was ready to go in. She looked at me, grinned, and said, “Nice tan lines girlfriend.”

“Huh?”, I said.

“Look in the mirror. You have some lovely girl's tan lines. Not to mention that you picked up some more color on your face.”

I walked over and looked in the mirror, and I did have tan lines. Girls tan lines. It looked like I'd been wearing a bra, which in a way I had been. I looked at Amy, and said, “Well I guess no going to the lake this summer.”

“Why?”, she asked.

“A guy with girl's tan lines. No thank you.”

“So, go as Tammy.”

“No.”

“Why not? You look cute in a girls swimsuit. And it could be fun.”

“I would miss going to the lake.”

“Yes, you would. And I'd miss you being with me.”

“You'd go without me?”

“Sure.”

“Really?”

“You know I wouldn't.”

We finished getting cleaned up and dressed in comfortable clothes to go to a movie. Then we shared the pizza for dinner with Amy's parents. As we were eating, Amy's dad asked, “Tammy. Why do you think that you, or Tom, likes to dress as a girl?”

“Well, daddy.”, I replied. “I'm not one-hundred percent sure why I do. But it might have something to do with my Navajo heritage and believing that I'm one of the people who have both a male and female psyche. Amy sees it, so do my parents, and the friend that's a psych major also believes in it.

“The clothes are just to make my male body look as much like a girl as they can. Tammy is always with me. Sometimes she's in the background, and sometimes she's out front. Like now.

“I know that you were amazed as to how I looked when we did that fake wedding. Sometimes I'm even surprised as to how easy it is for me to look like a girl. It also scares me at times.

“All I know for sure is, I like being Tammy but I also like it that I can change back to Tom when I want to. And, like I've told Amy, I love what I have and don't want to be Tammy full time. Nor do I need to be her full time. But I accept that Tammy is part of me and embrace it.”

“Tammy or Tommy. You are an interesting person.”, Amy's dad said. “Watching you the past day, I saw a girl. Seeing you and Amy playing in the pool and just talking with you showed me that there was another girl here. Another daughter.”

I smiled and said, “Thanks, daddy. I'm glad that you accept me and maybe understand it a little.”

“So where are you two off to tonight?”

“We thought that we might go to a movie.”

When we arrived home after the movie, they were still playing cards. We stuck our heads in and said hello to everyone, and I was introduced as Amy's cousin-in-law. We received smiles and hellos from everyone. Then Amy's mother asked if we were going to go to church with them in the morning. And we said that we would love to.

In the morning, we were up early, had breakfast, and dressed for church. We both had on pretty dresses, heels, subtle makeup, and our hair done in a nice feminine way. We noticed the late teen and early twenty-something boys were paying very close attention to us until they saw that both of us were wearing wedding bands.

We stopped on the way home for lunch, and the first thing I said was, “Mom and dad. Amy and I want to cook a dinner for you tonight. Would you mind?”

Amy's mother said, “Honey. We'd love it. Your mother has told me that you two can cook up a storm.”

I smiled, and said, “We try to.”

Amy and I did cook a nice meal for the four of us, then as we were eating, I said, “I think I know the answer to this. But, daddy do you think you've gotten to know me a little better?”

“Yes. I think I have.”, Amy’s dad said. “It's been an enjoyable weekend. Seeing the two of you together, and Amy accepting you as she does. I think that I have two daughters now. At least part of the time.”

After Amy and I cleaned up the dinner dishes, while her parents drank a cup of coffee and we talked, and then we headed back to my parent's house. We both had classes the next day.

Amy and I had two more weeks of classes and a week of finals, and spring quarter would be over. But, we'd only have a one week break after finals before Amy would start doing clinicals as a student nurse at the university's hospital. We had to buy her student nurse uniforms, which are different than a regular nurses uniform. And they also wore a cap that was different than what a regular nurse wears. And she also needed white nylons and white shoes.

After class on Monday, we went to the local uniform shop and looked for the uniforms that she'd need. A clerk asked if she could help, and Amy explained to the clerk that she was starting her clinicals this summer and needed a couple student nurse's uniforms. She took us over to the uniforms for the university's program and asked Amy her size. Then the clerk pulled a couple of uniforms off the rack and showed Amy to a changing room. When Amy came out to show me the uniform, she looked cute in it.

Along with two uniforms, we also purchased a student nurse's cap, a pair of white shoes, and some white nylons.

When we were back home and were carrying everything in, my mother met us, and said, “Amy. There's a letter for you on the kitchen table.”

“Thanks, mom.”, Amy said. Then to me, she said, “Honey. Will you take my things to our room?”

“Sure.”, I said.

Amy went with my mother to the kitchen, and I carried everything to our room. Then I joined them in the kitchen. Amy had a big smile on her face, and I asked, “So. What was in the letter?”

“Oh, nothing much.”, Amy replied. “Just that Sigma Theta Tau has my application, and want me to call to make an appointment for an interview.”

“So call.”

“I don't want to seem too anxious.”

“Amy. Just call ‘em.”

Amy walked over to the kitchen wall phone, looked at the letter, and called. She told them who she was and that she was supposed to call and make an appointment for an interview. She listened, then said, “Yes. I can do Wednesday at seven. ... Yes, I know where that is. ... Yes. Thank you. I'll see you then. Bye.”

As she hung up the phone, she punched the air and almost screamed, “Yes!”

“A little excited?”, I said.

“Just a little.”, she replied with a big smile.

I said, “So?”

“You heard the conversation.”

“Yeah. So where do you have to be at seven on Wednesday?”

“The Dean's office at the school of nursing.”

“Want me to go with you?”

“Please. I think I'll be too nervous to drive.”

On Wednesday on the way home from school we stopped to see Mrs. Thomas so that Amy could have her hair done. Amy was so nervous that she didn’t even eat dinner. So I told her that we'd stop someplace on the way home.

When Amy came out of our room, she looked fantastic. She was wearing a pretty gray suit with a pleated skirt. She had done a great job on her makeup but hadn't gone overboard. She wore nylons, a pair of black heels and had a purse to match.

We drove, in silence, to the university and parked. Then we walked to the School of Nursing and the dean's office. She told the girl sitting at the desk who she was, and she was told to take a seat. A few minutes later someone came to get her, and she said to me, “I'll be back.”

I smiled and said, “I'll be here.”

I picked up a magazine and tried to read. But it was no use. I was too nervous for her.

Forty-five minutes later, with a smile on her face, accompanied by five women, Amy came back out, and it appeared that they were all on friendly terms. They talked for a minute or two. Then Amy walked over to me, and asked, “So. Where are you taking me for dinner?”

“Anywhere you want to go.”, I replied. “But what happened.”

She took my hand and led me out of the building. And as soon as we were outside, she turned to me, wrapped her arms around my neck, and kissed me.

When we broke the kiss, I asked, “So. Who were the women?”

“One was the dean, one was the president of the chapter, and the others were members of the membership committee.”, Amy replied.

“And what happened?”

“Oh. Not much. But the Saturday after this I have to be at a meeting. And if the membership approves, I’ll be inducted into Sigma Theta Tau.”

“Not much! I'd say a lot happened.”

“Yeah. It did.”

“Congratulations sweetheart!” And we kissed again.

She only wanted to go to one of our regular hangouts for a late dinner. And she was overdressed to go there. But that's where we went. As we were eating and talking, Amy told me that there were two girls that they were tapped for membership before the end of the school year. Her and her friend Cindy. And that the two of them were at the top of the sophomore class, and that they wanted to honor them before the end of the term. Then after the school year was over, they'd send letters offering memberships in Sigma Theta Tau to the others that met the criteria.

On the way home, we swung past her parent's house, went in, and told them. They were very excited for Amy and proud of her. Then at home, my parents were very happy for her.

That night Amy was on a real high, and we didn't get to sleep for a long time even though we were in bed. If you know what I mean.

The next morning she was still on a high, and she was full of all kinds of energy. At breakfast, she told me that she wanted to buy a new dress to wear the following Saturday. And all I said was, “When do you want to go shopping?”

She grinned, and said, “After class today.”

Well, needless to say, we went shopping. And when we finished, Amy had a new dress, and a new pair of shoes. Then I asked her, “Do I get to go?”

“Sorry honey.”, she replied. “But no. This is a members only meeting. They have a dinner and dance in the fall, and you can go to that.”

I faked being hurt, and said, “Oh. Okay. I guess.”

On top of all of this, Larry had finished his paper and wanted us to read it. So one evening he and Kelly came over with a couple of copies of his research paper. We sat in the den, and Amy and I read Larry’s it. We finished reading at about the same time, and I said to Larry, “Larry. This is very good. You’ve touched on everything including the American Indian connection. And I'm glad that you didn’t dwell on the homosexual aspect of it.”

“I didn’t dwell on it because it’s not part of my subject.”, Larry replied.

“It's excellent.”, Amy said. “You covered everything and the important things in detail. And it’s clear and concise.”

“Thanks, guys. I'm so nervous about turning this in. Dr. Grunewald would still like to see you as a subject for a doctoral thesis.”

“Only for you or Kelly.”, I said.

The rest of the week and the following week went perfectly for the two of us. And on the Saturday between the last week of classes and finals week, Amy was being inducted into the nursing honorary society. And she was a bundle of nerves.

She had to be at the meeting at five in the afternoon. So in the early afternoon, she disappeared into our room to get ready. Earlier today, she had gone to have her hair done, and when she came back home, her hair was fantastic. Helen had outdone herself. And when she finally emerged from our room and walked into the den, she was radiant, almost as radiant as she was at our wedding.

Then she said that she was nervous and asked me to take her to the meeting. Of course, I said I would. As we were getting into the car, I asked her, “So. Where are we going?”

“Oh. Didn't I tell you?”, she replied.

“No.”

“Oh. Do you remember the hotel we stayed at when we were married?”

“Of course.”

“Well, it's there.”

Fifteen minutes later we were pulling up in front of the hotel. The doorman opened Amy's door. I kissed her, and said, “I'll be home. Give me a call, and I'll come and get you.”

“I will.”, Amy replied. “Or maybe I can get a ride home.”

“Let me know either way. I love you.”

“I will. And I love you very much.”

She gave me another quick kiss, got out of the car, and walked into the hotel. And I drove home.

It was lonely around the house without Amy being there, and my parents were also out for the evening. So, I just settled in the den and studied for my next week's final exams. It was almost ten when the phone rang. I answered it, and Amy told me that she was getting a ride home with her friend Cindy and that they should be home shortly. I went and turned on the front porch light.

Fifteen minutes later I heard a car pull into the driveway. I walked to the front door and opened it just as Amy was getting out of a car. She saw me, smiled, said something to someone in the car, and walked towards the house. I could tell Amy was happy. She had a big smile on her face and was almost skipping as she walked. As she walked up to me, I saw the pin on her collar. She turned towards the car and waved. Then turned to me, threw her arms around me, and kissed me.

We walked into the house, she turned to me, again put her arms around my neck, and said, “Mr. Young. I love you so much.”

And before I could answer, she gave me a long, deep, kiss. When we finally broke the kiss, I looked at her, and said, “Well Mrs. Young. It looks like you are very happy. And, I love you too.”

“Lover, I am very happy. I have you. And you're all that I’ll ever need.”

“How did it go tonight?”

“Let's go in the kitchen, and I'll tell you all about it.”

We took some cold drinks out of the refrigerator and sat at the table. Then Amy told me that the dinner had been excellent and that everyone was very nice, and that they had a good time. Then after a short business meeting, they had called her and Cindy up front. Then they went over hers and Gail's qualifications for membership. Then she and Cindy were asked to leave the room while the membership talked and voted on them. When they were called back into the room, they were told that they both had been unanimously accepted as members. Then they were sworn in and presented with the pin of Sigma Theta Tau International.

Right after Amy had finished, we then heard the garage door open, so my parents were home. A few minutes later my parents walked into the kitchen. My mother looked at Amy, and said, “Amy. You look fantastic.”

“Thanks, mom.”, Amy replied.

“How did it go?”

“It was nice. And they are a great bunch of people.”

Amy then showed my parents the pin that she'd received. And they both loved it. Then Amy said, “They told us that we could wear it on our student nurse's uniform and that they’d like us to do that. But, that we might want to get a less expensive one to wear just in case we lost it.”

On the Monday of finals week, the last issue of the school newspaper for the year came out. And on the front page was a story about two nursing students being inducted into Sigma Theta Tau. And there was a picture of Amy and her friend Cindy.

Finals week was going great until Amy and I came home on Wednesday. As we walked into the kitchen, my mother was sitting at the table crying. I asked, “Mom. What's wrong?”

“Kids.”, she said. “Sit down.”

Amy and I looked at each other, then sat down. We sat there for a minute until my mother composed herself, then she looked at us, and said, “I was just on the phone with your Aunt Ruth. And your grandmother had a heart attack yesterday.”

“Mom!”, Amy said. “Is ... Is she okay?”

“She's still with us, but in the hospital. And she’s had open heart surgery. And they're not sure if she'll survive this or not.”

I sat there in shock and felt tears rolling down my cheeks. Amy asked, “Is she in a good hospital?”

“Yes, they took her to one in Albuquerque.”

“She doesn't live there does she?”

“No. She lives north of Santa Fe at the resort with your Aunt Ruth and Uncle Paul. And your Aunt Ginny lives in Gallup with her husband, and she works for the Navajo Nation Council in Window Rock.”

Amy looked at me, saw that I was crying, took me in her arms, and held me.

Finally, my mother said, “Kids. I'm going to fly out there to see her.”

“When?”, I asked.

“Either Friday or Saturday. It depends on when I can get a flight.”

“If it’s Saturday can ... can I go with you?”

“Honey.”, Amy said. “It's can we go with her. I love your grandmother.”

“I'm sorry. Mom. Can we go with you?”

“Sure kids.”, my mother replied. “I'll see what I can do about a flight.”

“What about dad?”

“I'm planning on staying out there until grandma comes home, and he probably can't get the time off. I guess they are close to a breakthrough on something important.”

“We couldn't stay long either.”, Amy said. “My clinicals start a week from this coming Monday.”

“That's right. So, I'll get you flights back the following Friday or Saturday.”

“That should work.”

I was feeling something, I knew what it was, and it was telling me something. And I said, “Mom?”

“Yes, honey.”

“I ... I have this feeling that I need to be Tammy when we go. Is that a problem.”

“Honey. No. It's not a problem. I'll just make your reservation in Tammy's name. And, I'll call your Aunt Ruth when I know our flight details.”

Amy asked, “But why Tammy?”

“I just have this feeling that it would be good to be there as her.”, I replied.

“I guess then Tammy it’ll be.”

“Will we be staying with Aunt Ruth?”, Amy asked.

“Yes. She and your uncle run a resort that is north of Santa Fe. And grandma lives at the resort too. It's a resort that has hot mineral springs that are supposed to be sacred. But it's two hours from Albuquerque.”

“Sacred to the Native people?”, I asked.

“Yes.”

“Oh.” And I sat there staring into space.

“Honey is something wrong?”

“Ah. No. I don't think so. I just felt something again.”

“What?”

“I'm not sure. But, Amy, will you bring the necklace with you when we go.”

“The necklace?”, Amy replied. “Oh, that necklace. Sure honey. But why?”

“I don't know. It may be nothing.”

Later that evening Amy and I were sitting in the den studying for our final exams. After a little while, I noticed that Amy was looking at me. I looked at her and asked, “Is something wrong?”

“You tell me?”, she replied.

“What do you mean?”

“Why is Tammy going to New Mexico?”

“When mom told us about grandma's heart attack, I felt my female spirit’s sadness, and it was much stronger than even mine was. And I felt her wanting to go.”

“But wouldn't she go when you went?”

“Yeah. But I felt her wanting to be there in more than spirit. I also think she might be more spiritual than I am. And, her being there may mean more to grandma. Plus I believe that she may be able to help grandma.”

“Help grandma?”

“I don’t know. It’s just what I feel. I guess we’ll see when we get there.”

“Okay. But why the necklace?”

“I'm not sure. I just felt that my female spirit wanted us to take it.”

“I guess we'll find out.”