Why Are Thousands Still Clamoring for Rabbi Avigdor Miller’s Wisdom?קוואל וואסער האט געשריבן: ↑ דינסטאג מאי 07, 2024 1:38 pmלכאורה איז רבי אביגדור זצ"ל געווען פון די מערסטע אונטערגעשאצטע גדולי ישראל אין פריערדיגן דור.
איך וואלט אים נאך געקענט זעהן... אבער ער האט דאן געהייסן נאר עפעס "א ראביי אין פלעטבוש..."
זיינע ווערטער זענען אזוי גראד, איינפאך, עמוק עמוק, געווייקט אין דביקות בד' און דברי חז"ל, מלא חכמה וקדושה, מען זעהט כמעט נישט אזאנס, כל רז לא אניס לי', אפשר קען מען זאגן כדברי הראשונים!
ער האט א טעיפ "עשרת הדברות פון חיי נישואין," יעדע חתן כלה (און זייערע עלטערן) דארפן דאס קענען ווי אשרי יושבי.
שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
פסיכאלאגיע און מעדיצינען
די אחראים: זייער נייגעריג , אחראי , thefact
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
איינער ווייסט אפשר ווי דעס געפינט זיך? איך האב געזעהן א חתם סופ"ר וואס ברענגט (דאכצימער) פון זיי רבי ר' נתן אדלער זצ"ל, אז די בעסטע סגילה פאר "שלום בית" איז אריינצוקומען מיט א שמייכל אויפען פנים.
געזעהן דאס מיט עטליכע יאר צוריק אבער איך קען עס נישט טרעפן.
יישר כח למפרע
געזעהן דאס מיט עטליכע יאר צוריק אבער איך קען עס נישט טרעפן.
יישר כח למפרע
- רעים
- שר שבעת אלפים
- תגובות: 7985
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:דאנערשטאג אוגוסט 30, 2018 2:29 pm
- לאקאציע:אישי
- פארבינד זיך:
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
געלערנט היינט און די בלאט (סוף איזהו נשך)
אז דריי שרייען און מ'קען זיי נישט העלפן ווייל זיי זענען אליין שילדיג... איינער פון דעם איז 'מי שאשתו מושלת עליו'... .
מיט וואס איז ער אליין שילדיג? נאר יעדע שטוב האט א מושל אויב איז ער נישט די מושל (והוא ימשל בך) ווערט זי די מושל.... (יעב"ץ)
אז דריי שרייען און מ'קען זיי נישט העלפן ווייל זיי זענען אליין שילדיג... איינער פון דעם איז 'מי שאשתו מושלת עליו'... .
מיט וואס איז ער אליין שילדיג? נאר יעדע שטוב האט א מושל אויב איז ער נישט די מושל (והוא ימשל בך) ווערט זי די מושל.... (יעב"ץ)
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
משלי י״ד:א
[חַכְמ֣וֹת נָ֭שִׁים בָּנְתָ֣ה בֵיתָ֑הּ וְ֝אִוֶּ֗לֶת בְּיָדֶ֥יהָ תֶהֶרְסֶֽנּוּ׃
[חַכְמ֣וֹת נָ֭שִׁים בָּנְתָ֣ה בֵיתָ֑הּ וְ֝אִוֶּ֗לֶת בְּיָדֶ֥יהָ תֶהֶרְסֶֽנּוּ׃
Rav Avigdor Miller on the Job of the Jewish Mother
Q:
A girl who has some extra time, what is preferable if she wants to get close to Hashem? Should she go to a Torah class and learn or should she do extra chesed or maybe kiruv rechokim?
A:
A girl of that age, I imagine is of marriageable age. So I would say that her first job is to get married – not to think about shiurim or kiruv rechokim. If she’s seventeen or eighteen, that’s the time to get married. The older you are, the less children you’re going to have and the less success you’ll be in marriage.
When you marry young, you’ll have more children and that’s your big success in life. A woman who brings up children; she cooks and bakes and cleans the house and washes diapers, she’s a servant of Hakodosh Boruch Hu. If she does it l’shem Shamayim, it’s a glorious opportunity for greatness!
Don’t go far afield and think that you want to write seforim and give lectures. Forget about that. Your job is right at hand for you – to be a successful housewife, a successful mother.
חכמת נשים בנתה ביתה – The wisdom of women builds a house, ואולת – but a foolish woman, בידה תהרסנה – she knocks down a house with her own hands. Foolish women make a house into a tragedy. They complain and they make everybody sick. They ruin the house and sometimes their husbands even die young because of them. But a woman who is careful in fulfilling her obligations, her husband lives longer. He’s happy. The children are happy. She gives them good meals. She learns how to cook well. She becomes a master chef. And she’s a manager of the household. She saves money. She tries her best to shop and save and she’s always busy mending things and sewing; and her mind is always full of one thought: She is serving Hakodosh Boruch Hu in the very best way that was given to her; there’s nothing greater in the service of Hashem for a woman than being a successful mother and a wife.
So if you’re asking what to do until you’re married, so I could tell you a number of things, but I don’t want to overshadow the most important function and that is, aim to be married.
While we’re on the subject, I would tell you to try to marry the best man you can. The best man is the one who has good character; a steady man who is going to work and earn a living, and not to be a lazy loafer. There are plenty of lazy loafers. I counted very many of them; frum good-for-nothings who don’t make a living. If they sit and learn all day long b’hasmadah – excellent! But not everybody does that. So if you find a man who is going to maintain the household with responsibility; and he’s an oved Hashem who goes to beis haknesses and davens three times a day and he’s interested in maintaining a house with yiras Shomayim, that’s what you want. Look for a man who’s an idealist, and devote your life to making him and the children happy.
Here is an ideal mother. She has a child who is slow so she sits every evening coaching her child. Two hours every evening! It’s heartbreaking but she doesn’t give up. That’s her job. Her husband is very busy; he’s teaching other children. He has to go to the beis haknesses to daven and to go to shiurim. So she sits every evening for two hours and coaches that slow child! She helps all the children with the homework. That mother is mamesh a rosh yeshiva! Her zchus is immeasurable! How great she is! She won’t be honored. She’s humble. She doesn’t wear a black hat. She doesn’t have a long beard. She doesn’t have payos. But she has everything! The gemara says, נשים במאי זכיין – How are women zocheh? Women are zocheh if they make their husbands go to learn and they make their children learn.
And when the time comes and she has to go to the next world, עוז והדר לבושה – She’ll be clothed in strength and in beauty. She didn’t spend much money on herself in this world. She saved money for the family. But when she comes to the next world she’ll be wearing the most beautiful garments. עוז והדר לבושה – her garments are strength and beauty, ותשחק ליום אחרון – she’ll laugh at the last day. It means that she can face the future, Olam Habah, with confidence.
And the Gemara says: גדולה הבטחה – How great is the promise to women! Women are not as responsible as men are to accomplish things outside the home. Men have to accomplish things, certain things. Your husband, they’ll ask him questions: Did you daven with kavanah? Did you learn Torah? Did you do this? Did you do that? Shleimus, many other things are expected of him. But of women we are interested that they should fulfill their function of maintaining a frum home and having children – as many as they can – and raising them in the derech haTorah. And for that, גדולה הבטחה – “How great is the promise,” Hashem says, “that I make to women, נשים שאננות – You women of peace.” It means, you don’t have to worry. You have nothing to fear because you know already that Hakodosh Boruch Hu will reward you.
It’s not easy, but women have the work cut out for them – clear cut work: Be successful as a mother and as a wife! If you’re successful as a frum Jewish mother, a frum Jewish wife, then you’re going to sit on a golden throne in Gan Eden.
TAPE # 713 (October 1988)
Q:
A girl who has some extra time, what is preferable if she wants to get close to Hashem? Should she go to a Torah class and learn or should she do extra chesed or maybe kiruv rechokim?
A:
A girl of that age, I imagine is of marriageable age. So I would say that her first job is to get married – not to think about shiurim or kiruv rechokim. If she’s seventeen or eighteen, that’s the time to get married. The older you are, the less children you’re going to have and the less success you’ll be in marriage.
When you marry young, you’ll have more children and that’s your big success in life. A woman who brings up children; she cooks and bakes and cleans the house and washes diapers, she’s a servant of Hakodosh Boruch Hu. If she does it l’shem Shamayim, it’s a glorious opportunity for greatness!
Don’t go far afield and think that you want to write seforim and give lectures. Forget about that. Your job is right at hand for you – to be a successful housewife, a successful mother.
חכמת נשים בנתה ביתה – The wisdom of women builds a house, ואולת – but a foolish woman, בידה תהרסנה – she knocks down a house with her own hands. Foolish women make a house into a tragedy. They complain and they make everybody sick. They ruin the house and sometimes their husbands even die young because of them. But a woman who is careful in fulfilling her obligations, her husband lives longer. He’s happy. The children are happy. She gives them good meals. She learns how to cook well. She becomes a master chef. And she’s a manager of the household. She saves money. She tries her best to shop and save and she’s always busy mending things and sewing; and her mind is always full of one thought: She is serving Hakodosh Boruch Hu in the very best way that was given to her; there’s nothing greater in the service of Hashem for a woman than being a successful mother and a wife.
So if you’re asking what to do until you’re married, so I could tell you a number of things, but I don’t want to overshadow the most important function and that is, aim to be married.
While we’re on the subject, I would tell you to try to marry the best man you can. The best man is the one who has good character; a steady man who is going to work and earn a living, and not to be a lazy loafer. There are plenty of lazy loafers. I counted very many of them; frum good-for-nothings who don’t make a living. If they sit and learn all day long b’hasmadah – excellent! But not everybody does that. So if you find a man who is going to maintain the household with responsibility; and he’s an oved Hashem who goes to beis haknesses and davens three times a day and he’s interested in maintaining a house with yiras Shomayim, that’s what you want. Look for a man who’s an idealist, and devote your life to making him and the children happy.
Here is an ideal mother. She has a child who is slow so she sits every evening coaching her child. Two hours every evening! It’s heartbreaking but she doesn’t give up. That’s her job. Her husband is very busy; he’s teaching other children. He has to go to the beis haknesses to daven and to go to shiurim. So she sits every evening for two hours and coaches that slow child! She helps all the children with the homework. That mother is mamesh a rosh yeshiva! Her zchus is immeasurable! How great she is! She won’t be honored. She’s humble. She doesn’t wear a black hat. She doesn’t have a long beard. She doesn’t have payos. But she has everything! The gemara says, נשים במאי זכיין – How are women zocheh? Women are zocheh if they make their husbands go to learn and they make their children learn.
And when the time comes and she has to go to the next world, עוז והדר לבושה – She’ll be clothed in strength and in beauty. She didn’t spend much money on herself in this world. She saved money for the family. But when she comes to the next world she’ll be wearing the most beautiful garments. עוז והדר לבושה – her garments are strength and beauty, ותשחק ליום אחרון – she’ll laugh at the last day. It means that she can face the future, Olam Habah, with confidence.
And the Gemara says: גדולה הבטחה – How great is the promise to women! Women are not as responsible as men are to accomplish things outside the home. Men have to accomplish things, certain things. Your husband, they’ll ask him questions: Did you daven with kavanah? Did you learn Torah? Did you do this? Did you do that? Shleimus, many other things are expected of him. But of women we are interested that they should fulfill their function of maintaining a frum home and having children – as many as they can – and raising them in the derech haTorah. And for that, גדולה הבטחה – “How great is the promise,” Hashem says, “that I make to women, נשים שאננות – You women of peace.” It means, you don’t have to worry. You have nothing to fear because you know already that Hakodosh Boruch Hu will reward you.
It’s not easy, but women have the work cut out for them – clear cut work: Be successful as a mother and as a wife! If you’re successful as a frum Jewish mother, a frum Jewish wife, then you’re going to sit on a golden throne in Gan Eden.
TAPE # 713 (October 1988)
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
קהלת י״א: י׳
והסר כעס מלבך והעבר רעה מבשרך כי הילדות והשחרות הבל.
EMOR 5784 – Anger and the Afterlife
From Rabbi Avigdor Miller
Anger Causes Trouble
Stupid Customs and Divorce
Shlomo HaMelech says, if you are married and your in-laws at the wedding have some criticism and at that time everybody is hectic and nervous, if you are prepared by learning these words that Shlomo HaMelech says, “remove ka’as from your heart” and they’re going to say something, something unfair to you, they might even say when you come out of the yichud room, it’s a stupid custom recently instituted that the chosson and kallah when they come out of the yichud room, so the kallah displays a gift that the chosson gave her. A new minhag – minhag America.
And so she comes out, so her mother says to her, “What did the chosson give you?”
She says, “He didn’t give me anything. He gave me a kiss.”
“He didn’t give you anything?!” And she says it in a loud voice.
And the chosson hears, and the chosson didn’t learn this passuk in Mishlei, so he retorts. “What’s it your business?” He says to the mother.
She answers him and he answers her. That’s the end. Then begins a long line of recriminations that end up in a divorce and a din Torah and a court fight and broken hearts and broken health. A tragedy. A terrible tragedy. Sometimes a child is born in between too. And that poor child is a victim, a lifelong victim of a broken home.
Had that boy prepared himself previously and he would have trained himself, of course the mother-in-law should have prepared herself too and the people wouldn’t have lost their temper at that moment, the incident would have passed by. They would have celebrated many brissim, many birthdays and bar mitzvas. They would have danced at chassunas of children and great grandchildren. Who knows how many happy occasions they could have celebrated together if not for one careless angry remark.
Losing It
There is so much to be lost when you “lose it”
How many people have lost jobs because of anger? How many people have lost their lives because of anger? And therefore, how many people have lost their health because of anger?
You know a man who has a certain condition, his wife can kill him without a gun. If she makes him angry and he boils up, suddenly something bursts, a blood vessel in his head bursts and he’s finished.
There was once a famous physician who diagnosed his own case and he said, “Any rascal can kill me because I’m an angry man,” he said. Any rascal will come and make me lose my temper, that’ll kill him. This physician said that and he was a famous English physician.
And so, Shlomo HaMelech is telling us that all kinds of disasters are waiting for a man who is quick tempered. Now that’s the plain peirush of the passuk because many people are blind today just because of anger.
There was a man who told me himself. How did he lose his eyesight? He acquired diabetes and it blinded him eventually. How did he become a diabetic? He said because he had a situation with a son that angered him constantly and his wife was on his son’s side and the end was that he acquired diabetes and he became blind. I once visited him in his apartment. He was stuck among the blacks in Crown Heights. A blind man all by himself. His wife had left him. I knocked on the door and the door was like a fortress. It was a solid iron door; poor man living by himself in a black neighborhood. He was stranded. And it’s because – all because of the middah of ka’as. Now I’m not saying he wasn’t justified, but whatever it was that’s what ka’as can cause.
People are not accustomed to search their ways to examine themselves, and probably are not aware. But the truth, however, is that if they would make an accounting and they would see finally what will be shown to them on the great day of reckoning; that the sins caused by ka’as outnumber all the good deeds and all the merits they achieved.
And that’s what the gemara is telling us – that והעבר רעה מבשרך – a person must take it into his head, whether he is a great ba’al ka’as or a little ba’al ka’as to think about this matter earnestly because it’s one of the great issues of life.
והסר כעס מלבך והעבר רעה מבשרך כי הילדות והשחרות הבל.
EMOR 5784 – Anger and the Afterlife
From Rabbi Avigdor Miller
Anger Causes Trouble
Stupid Customs and Divorce
Shlomo HaMelech says, if you are married and your in-laws at the wedding have some criticism and at that time everybody is hectic and nervous, if you are prepared by learning these words that Shlomo HaMelech says, “remove ka’as from your heart” and they’re going to say something, something unfair to you, they might even say when you come out of the yichud room, it’s a stupid custom recently instituted that the chosson and kallah when they come out of the yichud room, so the kallah displays a gift that the chosson gave her. A new minhag – minhag America.
And so she comes out, so her mother says to her, “What did the chosson give you?”
She says, “He didn’t give me anything. He gave me a kiss.”
“He didn’t give you anything?!” And she says it in a loud voice.
And the chosson hears, and the chosson didn’t learn this passuk in Mishlei, so he retorts. “What’s it your business?” He says to the mother.
She answers him and he answers her. That’s the end. Then begins a long line of recriminations that end up in a divorce and a din Torah and a court fight and broken hearts and broken health. A tragedy. A terrible tragedy. Sometimes a child is born in between too. And that poor child is a victim, a lifelong victim of a broken home.
Had that boy prepared himself previously and he would have trained himself, of course the mother-in-law should have prepared herself too and the people wouldn’t have lost their temper at that moment, the incident would have passed by. They would have celebrated many brissim, many birthdays and bar mitzvas. They would have danced at chassunas of children and great grandchildren. Who knows how many happy occasions they could have celebrated together if not for one careless angry remark.
Losing It
There is so much to be lost when you “lose it”
How many people have lost jobs because of anger? How many people have lost their lives because of anger? And therefore, how many people have lost their health because of anger?
You know a man who has a certain condition, his wife can kill him without a gun. If she makes him angry and he boils up, suddenly something bursts, a blood vessel in his head bursts and he’s finished.
There was once a famous physician who diagnosed his own case and he said, “Any rascal can kill me because I’m an angry man,” he said. Any rascal will come and make me lose my temper, that’ll kill him. This physician said that and he was a famous English physician.
And so, Shlomo HaMelech is telling us that all kinds of disasters are waiting for a man who is quick tempered. Now that’s the plain peirush of the passuk because many people are blind today just because of anger.
There was a man who told me himself. How did he lose his eyesight? He acquired diabetes and it blinded him eventually. How did he become a diabetic? He said because he had a situation with a son that angered him constantly and his wife was on his son’s side and the end was that he acquired diabetes and he became blind. I once visited him in his apartment. He was stuck among the blacks in Crown Heights. A blind man all by himself. His wife had left him. I knocked on the door and the door was like a fortress. It was a solid iron door; poor man living by himself in a black neighborhood. He was stranded. And it’s because – all because of the middah of ka’as. Now I’m not saying he wasn’t justified, but whatever it was that’s what ka’as can cause.
People are not accustomed to search their ways to examine themselves, and probably are not aware. But the truth, however, is that if they would make an accounting and they would see finally what will be shown to them on the great day of reckoning; that the sins caused by ka’as outnumber all the good deeds and all the merits they achieved.
And that’s what the gemara is telling us – that והעבר רעה מבשרך – a person must take it into his head, whether he is a great ba’al ka’as or a little ba’al ka’as to think about this matter earnestly because it’s one of the great issues of life.
- עס וועט זיין גוט
- שר שלשת אלפים
- תגובות: 3596
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך אקטאבער 20, 2021 2:15 pm
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
יקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
- עס וועט זיין גוט
- שר שלשת אלפים
- תגובות: 3596
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך אקטאבער 20, 2021 2:15 pm
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
- קלארערהייט
- שר חמישים ומאתים
- תגובות: 496
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:דאנערשטאג סעפטעמבער 12, 2019 6:50 am
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
30 וואס? [איך האב נישט געהערט די שיעור]עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
- אונטערגעשריבענערהייט
- שר חמשת אלפים
- תגובות: 5066
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מוצ"ש יוני 10, 2023 11:04 pm
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
30 גיטין אין ר”ח איירקלארערהייט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 5:16 pm30 וואס? [איך האב נישט געהערט די שיעור]עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
וואס מיינט געווענטליך?עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
שטעלט אייך פאר די "שטילקייט"וואס וואלט געהערשט אויב מענטשן וואלטן ווען געזאגט זאכן וואס זיי "ווייסן"
- עס וועט זיין גוט
- שר שלשת אלפים
- תגובות: 3596
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך אקטאבער 20, 2021 2:15 pm
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
א געווענטליכע ערב ר"חזוכה האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 7:18 pmוואס מיינט געווענטליך?עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
ס'איז נישט דא מער ערב ראש חודש ווי סתם א טאג, ערב ראש חודש אייר איז דא אסאך, ווייל אין חודש אייר מאכט מען נישט קיין גיטין.עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ דינסטאג מאי 21, 2024 2:58 pmא געווענטליכע ערב ר"חזוכה האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 7:18 pmוואס מיינט געווענטליך?עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
שטעלט אייך פאר די "שטילקייט"וואס וואלט געהערשט אויב מענטשן וואלטן ווען געזאגט זאכן וואס זיי "ווייסן"
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
משלי ל״א
אֵֽשֶׁת־חַ֭יִל מִ֣י יִמְצָ֑א וְרָחֹ֖ק מִפְּנִינִ֣ים מִכְרָֽהּ׃
בָּ֣טַח בָּ֭הּ לֵ֣ב בַּעְלָ֑הּ וְ֝שָׁלָ֗ל לֹ֣א יֶחְסָֽר׃
גְּמָלַ֣תְהוּ ט֣וֹב וְלֹא־רָ֑ע כֹּ֝֗ל יְמֵ֣י חַיֶּֽיהָ׃
דָּ֭רְשָׁה צֶ֣מֶר וּפִשְׁתִּ֑ים וַ֝תַּ֗עַשׂ בְּחֵ֣פֶץ כַּפֶּֽיהָ׃
הָ֭יְתָה כׇּאֳנִיּ֣וֹת סוֹחֵ֑ר מִ֝מֶּרְחָ֗ק תָּבִ֥יא לַחְמָֽהּ׃
וַתָּ֤קׇם ׀ בְּע֬וֹד לַ֗יְלָה וַתִּתֵּ֣ן טֶ֣רֶף לְבֵיתָ֑הּ וְ֝חֹ֗ק לְנַעֲרֹתֶֽיהָ׃
זָֽמְמָ֣ה שָׂ֭דֶה וַתִּקָּחֵ֑הוּ מִפְּרִ֥י כַ֝פֶּ֗יהָ (נטע) [נָ֣טְעָה] כָּֽרֶם׃
חָֽגְרָ֣ה בְע֣וֹז מׇתְנֶ֑יהָ וַ֝תְּאַמֵּ֗ץ זְרוֹעֹתֶֽיהָ׃
טָ֭עֲמָה כִּי־ט֣וֹב סַחְרָ֑הּ לֹא־יִכְבֶּ֖ה (בליל) [בַלַּ֣יְלָה] נֵרָֽהּ׃
יָ֭דֶיהָ שִׁלְּחָ֣ה בַכִּישׁ֑וֹר וְ֝כַפֶּ֗יהָ תָּ֣מְכוּ פָֽלֶךְ׃
אֵֽשֶׁת־חַ֭יִל מִ֣י יִמְצָ֑א וְרָחֹ֖ק מִפְּנִינִ֣ים מִכְרָֽהּ׃
בָּ֣טַח בָּ֭הּ לֵ֣ב בַּעְלָ֑הּ וְ֝שָׁלָ֗ל לֹ֣א יֶחְסָֽר׃
גְּמָלַ֣תְהוּ ט֣וֹב וְלֹא־רָ֑ע כֹּ֝֗ל יְמֵ֣י חַיֶּֽיהָ׃
דָּ֭רְשָׁה צֶ֣מֶר וּפִשְׁתִּ֑ים וַ֝תַּ֗עַשׂ בְּחֵ֣פֶץ כַּפֶּֽיהָ׃
הָ֭יְתָה כׇּאֳנִיּ֣וֹת סוֹחֵ֑ר מִ֝מֶּרְחָ֗ק תָּבִ֥יא לַחְמָֽהּ׃
וַתָּ֤קׇם ׀ בְּע֬וֹד לַ֗יְלָה וַתִּתֵּ֣ן טֶ֣רֶף לְבֵיתָ֑הּ וְ֝חֹ֗ק לְנַעֲרֹתֶֽיהָ׃
זָֽמְמָ֣ה שָׂ֭דֶה וַתִּקָּחֵ֑הוּ מִפְּרִ֥י כַ֝פֶּ֗יהָ (נטע) [נָ֣טְעָה] כָּֽרֶם׃
חָֽגְרָ֣ה בְע֣וֹז מׇתְנֶ֑יהָ וַ֝תְּאַמֵּ֗ץ זְרוֹעֹתֶֽיהָ׃
טָ֭עֲמָה כִּי־ט֣וֹב סַחְרָ֑הּ לֹא־יִכְבֶּ֖ה (בליל) [בַלַּ֣יְלָה] נֵרָֽהּ׃
יָ֭דֶיהָ שִׁלְּחָ֣ה בַכִּישׁ֑וֹר וְ֝כַפֶּ֗יהָ תָּ֣מְכוּ פָֽלֶךְ׃
Rav Avigdor Miller on Women in Business
Q:
How come in Eishes Chayil it alludes to a woman who makes good business when you just said that the woman should be in the home raising children?
A:
This gentleman asks a good question. In the chapter of Eishes Chayil he praises a woman who sells certain things that she made.
And the answer is domestic arts are certainly praised. In those days, almost everyone manufactured in the home thread by spinning and they wove textiles. And that’s what the woman is praised for, for selling.
So she did these things in the privacy of her home. But when a woman has to go into an office, we have to realize the mixing of men and women, even though we’re accustomed to the idea, is a perilous thing. It won’t work!
Where women and men are together in an office it’s not going to work because nature will assert itself.
There was a certain yeshivah where they had a gentile bookkeeper in one office and there was a Jewish stenographer in another office. And the end was that they got married. And the shidduch took place in the office of the mesivta.
Now, so you say well had they both been Jews there’s no harm in getting married. But there are preludes to getting married and these preludes take place in the office.
The mixing of the sexes is a curse for humanity.
Now, as I said I realize that people are so acclimated to present day standards that some of them have lost the ability to sense this. But there’s no question from so many reports that come in, so many divorce proceedings, so many newspaper reports, so many trials, we see what happens in the office. When men have females working in their office then there are very frequently bound to be some bad results.
The institution of a private secretary in an office when a man is alone with a woman or even not alone – things take place all the time.
And therefore that's a big objection, the mixing of the sexes. If women want to work in factories then you would remove this concern – the factories where only women work. But then she’s taken out of the home.
If a woman wants to go to school and she leaves her children with some babysitter, it’s not beneficial to the child. The best babysitter is not equivalent to the mother. Psychologically it’s the mother that has the most interest in protecting her baby. You know babies fall out of windows? Babies do all kinds of dangerous things. It’s the mother’s instinct that protects her children and the mother’s love that causes a child to develop with an even character. Otherwise there is a certain sourness in his nature because you don’t react to a strange woman as you do to your own mother.
There are many wrongs that result from the mother being away from the home.
And then of course the great problem of not wanting to have children. And they get a heter and they dodge the responsibilities and they end up by not having children. And that’s one of the biggest failures in life.
So when women deny themselves the career that was made for them, the career that will satisfy them most, the career that’s natural for them, then these people are just building up a future of unhappiness. For the moment they might deceive themselves, they are carried away by the current. There are a lot of such foolish people today who live an anti-social life, but eventually they are going to discover, these people, that you have to have your own home, your own husband and your own children and your own grandchildren.
Now life is never perfectly happy but if we follow the natural system that the Creator ordained for us, we have more opportunities, more chances to succeed in getting happiness than otherwise.
TAPE # 333 (October 9, 1980)
Q:
How come in Eishes Chayil it alludes to a woman who makes good business when you just said that the woman should be in the home raising children?
A:
This gentleman asks a good question. In the chapter of Eishes Chayil he praises a woman who sells certain things that she made.
And the answer is domestic arts are certainly praised. In those days, almost everyone manufactured in the home thread by spinning and they wove textiles. And that’s what the woman is praised for, for selling.
So she did these things in the privacy of her home. But when a woman has to go into an office, we have to realize the mixing of men and women, even though we’re accustomed to the idea, is a perilous thing. It won’t work!
Where women and men are together in an office it’s not going to work because nature will assert itself.
There was a certain yeshivah where they had a gentile bookkeeper in one office and there was a Jewish stenographer in another office. And the end was that they got married. And the shidduch took place in the office of the mesivta.
Now, so you say well had they both been Jews there’s no harm in getting married. But there are preludes to getting married and these preludes take place in the office.
The mixing of the sexes is a curse for humanity.
Now, as I said I realize that people are so acclimated to present day standards that some of them have lost the ability to sense this. But there’s no question from so many reports that come in, so many divorce proceedings, so many newspaper reports, so many trials, we see what happens in the office. When men have females working in their office then there are very frequently bound to be some bad results.
The institution of a private secretary in an office when a man is alone with a woman or even not alone – things take place all the time.
And therefore that's a big objection, the mixing of the sexes. If women want to work in factories then you would remove this concern – the factories where only women work. But then she’s taken out of the home.
If a woman wants to go to school and she leaves her children with some babysitter, it’s not beneficial to the child. The best babysitter is not equivalent to the mother. Psychologically it’s the mother that has the most interest in protecting her baby. You know babies fall out of windows? Babies do all kinds of dangerous things. It’s the mother’s instinct that protects her children and the mother’s love that causes a child to develop with an even character. Otherwise there is a certain sourness in his nature because you don’t react to a strange woman as you do to your own mother.
There are many wrongs that result from the mother being away from the home.
And then of course the great problem of not wanting to have children. And they get a heter and they dodge the responsibilities and they end up by not having children. And that’s one of the biggest failures in life.
So when women deny themselves the career that was made for them, the career that will satisfy them most, the career that’s natural for them, then these people are just building up a future of unhappiness. For the moment they might deceive themselves, they are carried away by the current. There are a lot of such foolish people today who live an anti-social life, but eventually they are going to discover, these people, that you have to have your own home, your own husband and your own children and your own grandchildren.
Now life is never perfectly happy but if we follow the natural system that the Creator ordained for us, we have more opportunities, more chances to succeed in getting happiness than otherwise.
TAPE # 333 (October 9, 1980)
- כווייס נישט אלעס
- שר האלף
- תגובות: 1900
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך יולי 29, 2015 1:02 am
- לאקאציע:BETWEEN
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
דעס איז נישט גוטע נייעס!עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
פארוואס נישט אדרעסירן די קאפעלס אליינס? איז נישט די חינוך/צוגרייטונג /אחריות די עיקר פראבלעם?
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
כווייס נישט אלעס האט געשריבן: ↑ מיטוואך מאי 22, 2024 8:03 pmדעס איז נישט גוטע נייעס!עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
פארוואס נישט אדרעסירן די קאפעלס אליינס? איז נישט די חינוך/צוגרייטונג /אחריות די עיקר פראבלעם?
די עיקר פראבלעם איז אז מענטשן נער'ן אריין מיט שידוכים, פילע בחורים/מיידלעך טרעפן זיך מיט גרויסע סורפרייזעס נאך די חתונה. גאר א קליינע פראצענט פון גיטין קומט פון נישט זיך דורכקומען/ נישט זיין צוגעגרייט/אחריות וכו' הער אויס די ערשטע פאדקעסט פון "שלמה ערליך" אויף לעיטעסט טאלקס, ער רעדט פון דעם.
זאגן אז די סיבה פארוואס ס'איז דא אסאך גיטין איז, ווייל די עלטערן ווייסן נישט וויאזוי צו דיעלן ווען עס מאכט זיך פראבלעמען ביי זייערע קינדער, איז פשוט נישט אמת.
שטעלט אייך פאר די "שטילקייט"וואס וואלט געהערשט אויב מענטשן וואלטן ווען געזאגט זאכן וואס זיי "ווייסן"
- כווייס נישט אלעס
- שר האלף
- תגובות: 1900
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך יולי 29, 2015 1:02 am
- לאקאציע:BETWEEN
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
סורפרייזעס= נישט גוט צוגעגרייטזוכה האט געשריבן: ↑ מיטוואך מאי 22, 2024 8:58 pmכווייס נישט אלעס האט געשריבן: ↑ מיטוואך מאי 22, 2024 8:03 pmדעס איז נישט גוטע נייעס!עס וועט זיין גוט האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 3:06 pm30 איז א מספר עצוםעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ מאנטאג מאי 20, 2024 8:47 amיקותיאל אלימלך פריעדמאן
ןןיפיל איז דא געווענטליך ??
פארוואס נישט אדרעסירן די קאפעלס אליינס? איז נישט די חינוך/צוגרייטונג /אחריות די עיקר פראבלעם?
די עיקר פראבלעם איז אז מענטשן נער'ן אריין מיט שידוכים, פילע בחורים/מיידלעך טרעפן זיך מיט גרויסע סורפרייזעס נאך די חתונה. גאר א קליינע פראצענט פון גיטין קומט פון נישט זיך דורכקומען/ נישט זיין צוגעגרייט/אחריות וכו' הער אויס די ערשטע פאדקעסט פון "שלמה ערליך" אויף לעיטעסט טאלקס, ער רעדט פון דעם.
זאגן אז די סיבה פארוואס ס'איז דא אסאך גיטין איז, ווייל די עלטערן ווייסן נישט וויאזוי צו דיעלן ווען עס מאכט זיך פראבלעמען ביי זייערע קינדער, איז פשוט נישט אמת.
- קלארערהייט
- שר חמישים ומאתים
- תגובות: 496
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:דאנערשטאג סעפטעמבער 12, 2019 6:50 am
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
אין די אלגעמיינע וועלט ווי מען קלויבט און קלויבט זיך אן א סוף ,זעה איך נישט אז זיי זאלן זיך לענגער האלטן אדער ווייניגער גיטין
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
אברבנאל על תורה , בראשית ג׳:י״זעובר ושב האט געשריבן: ↑ דינסטאג נאוועמבער 14, 2023 10:40 amבראשית ג׳ יז
וּלְאָדָ֣ם אָמַ֗ר כִּֽי־שָׁמַ֘עְתָּ֮ לְק֣וֹל אִשְׁתֶּ֒ךָ֒ וַתֹּ֙אכַל֙ מִן־הָעֵ֔ץ אֲשֶׁ֤ר צִוִּיתִ֙יךָ֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר לֹ֥א תֹאכַ֖ל מִמֶּ֑נּוּ אֲרוּרָ֤ה הָֽאֲדָמָה֙ בַּֽעֲבוּרֶ֔ךָ בְּעִצָּבוֹן֙ תֹּֽאכְלֶ֔נָּה כֹּ֖ל יְמֵ֥י חַיֶּֽיךָ׃
Reb Avigdor Miller
The Beginning
The sin was augmented by the fact that he hearkened to his wife's voice. Had he yielded to temptation to eat, it would have been less of a sin, for temptation presents a difficulty. But to allow his wife to persuade him to sin was an additional guilt, for Adam should have known that his own mind should be his advisor, but not the mind of his wife. Adam is expected to be his wife's teacher, but not her disciple. When her counsel is good, he should indeed consider it, but he must never surrender his own conscience merely because of his wife's desires. There is but One Voice to which a man must hearken: "You shall hearken to the voice of Hashem your G-d" (Dvarim 27: 10). Even a woman that hearkens to her husband against the will of Hashem is held fully responsible. But the guilt is greater when the man obeys his wife's counsel to commit a sin.
ולאדם אמר וגו' עד כתנות עור וילבישם. אחרי שקלל את הנחש שהיה המניע הראשון בזה ואת האשה שהיתה הסבה האמצעית בא לקלל את האדם שהיה החוטא בעצם ובאמת ו אמר לו כי שמעת לקול אשתך ותאכל מן העץ וגו' להגיד ששני פשעים גדולים עשה. הא' ששמע לאשתו ונכבש אליה במקום שראוי שהוא ימשל בה כי היא נתנה לו לעזר ולהועיל לעבוד ולמשא לא להנהיגו ולצוותו שיאכל מהנזהר והאיסור. ובב"ר (פרשה כ') אמרו לדברי אשתך לא נאמר אלא לקול אשתך ירצו בזה שנתנה עליו בקולה ומפחדה והרעשתה אכל אדם כאלו היא מושלת עליו. והוא אמרו עוד שם שהיתה מיללת עליו מה אתה סבור שאני מתה ואתה תישא אחרת.והפשע הב' שעבר על מצות השם באכלו מן העץ אשר צוהו לבלתי אכול ממנו.........................
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
כווייס נישט אלעס האט געשריבן: ↑ דאנערשטאג מאי 23, 2024 1:28 amסורפרייזעס= נישט גוט צוגעגרייטזוכה האט געשריבן: ↑ מיטוואך מאי 22, 2024 8:58 pmכווייס נישט אלעס האט געשריבן: ↑ מיטוואך מאי 22, 2024 8:03 pmדעס איז נישט גוטע נייעס!
פארוואס נישט אדרעסירן די קאפעלס אליינס? איז נישט די חינוך/צוגרייטונג /אחריות די עיקר פראבלעם?
די עיקר פראבלעם איז אז מענטשן נער'ן אריין מיט שידוכים, פילע בחורים/מיידלעך טרעפן זיך מיט גרויסע סורפרייזעס נאך די חתונה. גאר א קליינע פראצענט פון גיטין קומט פון נישט זיך דורכקומען/ נישט זיין צוגעגרייט/אחריות וכו' הער אויס די ערשטע פאדקעסט פון "שלמה ערליך" אויף לעיטעסט טאלקס, ער רעדט פון דעם.
זאגן אז די סיבה פארוואס ס'איז דא אסאך גיטין איז, ווייל די עלטערן ווייסן נישט וויאזוי צו דיעלן ווען עס מאכט זיך פראבלעמען ביי זייערע קינדער, איז פשוט נישט אמת.
לעיטעסט טאלקס: ר' שלמה ערליך - שידוכים
https://www.yiddish24.com/live/196/65592
הער אויס פון 49 מינוט און ווייטער.
שטעלט אייך פאר די "שטילקייט"וואס וואלט געהערשט אויב מענטשן וואלטן ווען געזאגט זאכן וואס זיי "ווייסן"
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
סוטה ב׳ א
אָמַר רַב שְׁמוּאֵל בַּר רַב יִצְחָק: כִּי הֲוָה פָּתַח רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ בְּסוֹטָה, אָמַר הָכִי: אֵין מְזַוְּוגִין לוֹ לְאָדָם אִשָּׁה אֶלָּא לְפִי מַעֲשָׂיו, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״כִּי לֹא יָנוּחַ שֵׁבֶט הָרֶשַׁע עַל גּוֹרַל הַצַּדִּיקִים״. אָמַר רַבָּה בַּר בַּר חָנָה אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן: וְקָשִׁין לְזַוְּוגָן כִּקְרִיעַת יַם סוּף, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״אֱלֹהִים מוֹשִׁיב יְחִידִים בַּיְתָה מוֹצִיא אֲסִירִים בַּכּוֹשָׁרוֹת״.
אָמַר רַב שְׁמוּאֵל בַּר רַב יִצְחָק: כִּי הֲוָה פָּתַח רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ בְּסוֹטָה, אָמַר הָכִי: אֵין מְזַוְּוגִין לוֹ לְאָדָם אִשָּׁה אֶלָּא לְפִי מַעֲשָׂיו, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״כִּי לֹא יָנוּחַ שֵׁבֶט הָרֶשַׁע עַל גּוֹרַל הַצַּדִּיקִים״. אָמַר רַבָּה בַּר בַּר חָנָה אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן: וְקָשִׁין לְזַוְּוגָן כִּקְרִיעַת יַם סוּף, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״אֱלֹהִים מוֹשִׁיב יְחִידִים בַּיְתָה מוֹצִיא אֲסִירִים בַּכּוֹשָׁרוֹת״.
Rav Avigdor Miller on the Difficulty of Making Shidduchim
Q:
Why do you criticize those who aren’t getting married if it states that if one wants to find his partner in life, it’s as difficult as kriyas Yam Suf (see Sotah 2a) ?
A:
Now we have to understand it’s not true. It doesn’t mean it’s difficult for you. It’s difficult for Hakodosh Boruch Hu kavayachol.
Why is that? Because Hakodosh Boruch Hu has to manipulate thousands of details in a person’s character.
It’s like if you have to make an automobile to order. If you make them on the assembly line, so one after the other they are exactly the same requirements. It’s not too difficult. But suppose a wealthy man wants an automobile made to order, with all types of specifications. So it’s difficult. You have special machinery.
Hakadosh Baruch Hu makes each person to order. There’s no assembly line. Nobody in the world has the same mind. אין דעותיהם שוות זו לזו. Of the millions of people, nobody has the same mind. The mind is very complicated; all kinds of middos, all kinds of attributes.
Hakadosh Baruch Hu has to make each person exactly to order for some other person. And each one is going to test the other. They’ll be living together and each one will become a shaleim if they utilize the opportunity correctly. Of course you have to utilize it correctly.
Now, Kriyas Yam Suf, Hakadosh Baruch Hu made. And He makes shidduchim too. But the complications of shidduchim are more complicated, more than even Kriyas Yam Suf. To tool a person and make his mentality fit for another person, making it to order each one, is such a difficult achievement that Hakadosh Baruch Hu considers it one of the most important things He does in the world and is more complicated than any neis that He did in the world.
TAPE # E-135 (April 2, 1998)
Q:
Why do you criticize those who aren’t getting married if it states that if one wants to find his partner in life, it’s as difficult as kriyas Yam Suf (see Sotah 2a) ?
A:
Now we have to understand it’s not true. It doesn’t mean it’s difficult for you. It’s difficult for Hakodosh Boruch Hu kavayachol.
Why is that? Because Hakodosh Boruch Hu has to manipulate thousands of details in a person’s character.
It’s like if you have to make an automobile to order. If you make them on the assembly line, so one after the other they are exactly the same requirements. It’s not too difficult. But suppose a wealthy man wants an automobile made to order, with all types of specifications. So it’s difficult. You have special machinery.
Hakadosh Baruch Hu makes each person to order. There’s no assembly line. Nobody in the world has the same mind. אין דעותיהם שוות זו לזו. Of the millions of people, nobody has the same mind. The mind is very complicated; all kinds of middos, all kinds of attributes.
Hakadosh Baruch Hu has to make each person exactly to order for some other person. And each one is going to test the other. They’ll be living together and each one will become a shaleim if they utilize the opportunity correctly. Of course you have to utilize it correctly.
Now, Kriyas Yam Suf, Hakadosh Baruch Hu made. And He makes shidduchim too. But the complications of shidduchim are more complicated, more than even Kriyas Yam Suf. To tool a person and make his mentality fit for another person, making it to order each one, is such a difficult achievement that Hakadosh Baruch Hu considers it one of the most important things He does in the world and is more complicated than any neis that He did in the world.
TAPE # E-135 (April 2, 1998)
- חיים טוב
- שר חמש מאות
- תגובות: 762
- זיך איינגעשריבן אום:מיטוואך אפריל 19, 2023 4:04 pm
- לאקאציע:7 בויבעריק דרייוו
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
איך וויל זייער שטארק אז מיין בני בית זאל ליינען א געוויסע בוך וואס די אינפארמעישן קען צוניצקימען פאר אינז ביידע וויאזוי קען איך ציברענגן זי זאל עס וועלן ליינען?
Re: שלום בית - סיפורים, השקפה, עצות, אין הדרכה, פין די חכמי הדורות
ליין פאר פון דעם איעדן טאג א שטיקל די פארדינסטן זענען פיל פאכיג
פעם התבטא כ"ק מרן מהרי"ד מבעלזא זי"ע ואמר בדרך צחות שעשיו דיבר יודיש כמו גוי שאמר ולמה זה לי בכורה שפירושו 'פארוואס דאס מיר בכורה' - (אוצר מאמרים משולחן רבותינו א' עמ' 222)
