Kiss Scenes That Were More Hilarious Than Romantic
Comedy is all about subverting expectations. The more established and predictable a movie cliche is, the riper it is for comedic subversion. That's why it's strange that, though kissing is ubiquitous throughout cinema, and even though there's an entire genre of film known as "romantic comedies," actually funny kisses — as in, kisses that are the punchline to a joke — aren't nearly as common as you'd think. Of course, they still happen — and oddly enough, a few of the same actors keep popping up in the funniest ones.
Here are our picks for the funniest kisses in film, whether these are kisses that happen at the worst possible moment, kisses between people who shouldn't be kissing in the first place, or kisses that go disastrously wrong. Mostly, we'll be covering smooches that are intentionally comedic, but there will also be some instances where we think the kiss may have been intended to be genuinely moving but ended up being totally laughable instead.
Read more: Actors Who Got Grossed Out Kissing Their Co-Star On Screen
(Columbia Pictures)In the 1990s, Jim Carrey was the undisputed king of physical comedy. He could find a way to make pretty much anything funny, and in his 1994 film "Dumb and Dumber," he showed that this talent extends to kissing as well.
The film follows the misadventures of a pair of affable dunces named Harry (Jeff Daniels) and Lloyd (Jim Carrey). After a brief encounter with a beautiful woman named Mary (Lauren Holly), Lloyd discovers that she has seemingly left behind her suitcase and boarded a plane without it. Seeing an opportunity to woo her with a grand romantic gesture, Lloyd vows to drive across the country to return it to her, and Harry tags along. As they travel, Lloyd has plenty of time to imagine what his eventual meeting with Mary will be like in a rather extensive daydream sequence.
The fantasy begins with Lloyd arriving at her door, and she is overjoyed to see him. At a dinner party, he entertains all her sophisticated friends by lighting his farts on fire. In a fancy restaurant, other men make advances upon her, but he dispatches them with his impressive martial arts skills. Finally, Lloyd and Mary stand before a roaring fireplace, and they do what Lloyd imagines kissing must be like, which involves turning his head sideways and wrapping his open mouth around the entire lower half of her face, like a snake swallowing its prey. But it's a fantasy, so needless to say, she's still very much into it.
(New Line Cinema)"Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle" took audiences by surprise. After an endless parade of forgettable reboots that no one was asking for, here was one that was, against all odds, actually good. The film has a killer ensemble cast, all operating at the top of their game, and it also features a gut-busting comedic kiss.
The film follows four kids trapped inside a magic video game, and if that weren't weird enough, they've also been transformed into pulp action heroes in full-grown adult bodies. Two of the friends, however, don't mind this change at all, as the skinny and awkward Spencer (Alex Wolff) has become the buff archeologist Doctor Xander Bravestone (Dwayne Johnson), and the quiet girl Martha (Morgan Turner) has become the kickass commando Ruby Roundhouse (Karen Gillan). Essentially, these A-list action stars are still a couple of shy nerds on the inside, which leads to an amazing scene in which Spencer and Martha finally admit their feelings for each other.
So The Rock and Karen Gillan, two of the most gorgeous people on the planet, awkwardly stumble through a confession of their feelings, and then embark upon a long and fumbling attempt at a kiss. Their faces scrunch up in unnatural positions. Their lips reach out for each other in a series of near-misses. Then Spencer tries to slip Martha a little bit of tongue, but by this time, she has already pulled away, so he just sort of licks the air a bit. It's uncomfortable, it's adorable, and for many of us, it's probably a painful reminder of our own terrible teenage first kisses.
(Columbia Pictures)The 2005 film "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" tells the tale of Andy ( Steve Carell ), who is — as the title suggests — a 40-year-old virgin, but he's doing everything he can to change that, which leads to his getting all sorts of strange smooches from all sorts of questionable women.
After Andy goes out with a total hot mess, Nicky (Leslie Mann), she ends up driving him home, despite having been drinking rather heavily. As such, Andy is fearing for his life as Nicky swerves all around the road while dancing along to Missy Elliott's "Get Ur Freak On." At one point, Nicky seems like she's just about to vomit, but she manages to hold it in, and she comments that she had a bad shellfish sandwich earlier. She then takes her eyes off the road to give Andy a passionate and sloppy kiss. She says, "That tasted good," to which Andy replies, "That tasted like shellfish."
They eventually arrive at their destination, but before they can kiss one last time, Nicky vomits all over Andy's face. She apologizes, saying she'll still sleep with him but Andy declines, clearly no longer in the mood. Then, as a final button on the scene, Andy, with his face coated in pinkish vomit, asks her, "Did you have a daiquiri tonight?"
(Universal Pictures)James Gunn is a filmmaker who delights in subverting audience expectations. Throughout the first "Guardians of the Galaxy," he seems to be setting up a classic romance between Peter Quill (Chris Pratt) and Gamora (Zoe Saldana). When they first meet, she doesn't think much of him. After they're forced into prison together, she downright hates him. However, when our heroes are about to escape this prison, Peter risks his life by going back for his Walkman, and Gamora glimpses another side of him. She's not attracted to him yet, but she's certainly intrigued. Could romance be brewing?
Later, Gamora asks Peter why this device is so important to him. Peter explains that it belonged to his mother and that sharing pop music was one way they related to each other. Gamora still doesn't seem to get it, so he puts the headphones on her and plays a bit of Elvin Bishop's "Fooled Around and Fell in Love." She sways with the music and shouts, "The melody is pleasant!" Peter takes her hand and sways along with her. She relaxes. He leans in. Their lips almost touch, and then Gamora puts a knife to his throat. She screams, "I know who you are, Peter Quill! And I am not some starry-eyed waif here to succumb to your ... your pelvic sorcery!"
In this moment, Gunn is making it clear — in the most hilarious way possible — that though there might be the beginnings of a romantic spark here, for now, the possibility of these two getting together is still lightyears away.
(Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)There's nothing about the 1986 film "Howard the Duck" that isn't bafflingly strange, but if we had to pick just one thing that is the most strange, it's probably the romance. This infamous flop tells the tale of Howard, who hails from a world of anthropomorphic ducks but gets transported to 1980s Cleveland. As he searches for a way home, he falls into a friendship with a musician, Beverly Switzler (Lea Thompson), which then gradually — like a slow-motion car crash — blossoms into love.
This subplot culminates in a deeply uncomfortable scene in which the two, lying in bed together, share a little pillow talk in their pajamas. We'll spare you the most uncomfortable images and cringeworthy lines, but let's just say that, over the course of the scene, Beverly repeatedly throws herself at Howard, and he nervously shrinks away from her affection again and again. However, she won't take no for an answer, and he eventually agrees to a peck on the beak before we mercifully fade to black.
The end result is certainly a funny scene, but probably not in the ways that the filmmakers intended, as the "jokes" the characters are delivering aren't at all the funny part. Among the stilted dialogue, the lack of consent on Howard's part, and the profound unsexiness of Howard's dead-eyed duck face, it's a scene that's caught in multiple uncanny valleys at once.
(Universal Pictures)"Hot Shots! Part Deux" is a ridiculous film that's absolutely jam-packed with gags. The big romantic dinner scene between our two leads is no exception, and it culminates in is a singular cinematic smooch.
Topper Harley (Charlie Sheen) has taken the enchanting Ramada (Valeria Golino) out for a romantic dinner at an Italian restaurant. First, Topper starts slurping a piece of spaghetti, only for Ramada's shoe to be pulled up into the frame, revealing that he was accidentally eating her shoelaces. Then comes an extensive recreation of the dinner scene from "The Lady and the Tramp." We're not just talking about that one usually parodied moment, where the two dogs slurp the same piece of spaghetti. They do it all. There's a musician playing an accordion in the background. Topper even offers his date a meatball by scooting it across the plate with his nose.
Then, after a few more rounds of hijinks, Ramada has a request for Topper. She says, "Kiss me like you've never kissed me before." Topper then dutifully fulfills this request by putting her entire nose in his mouth. It's jaw-droppingly absurd, made all the more hilarious by the unflinching commitment of the two actors involved.
As far as we're concerned, this is pure comedic gold, but if you don't care for this particular joke, we have good news. As is often the case with this sort of film, you're going to get another joke in about four more seconds.
(Twentieth Century Fox)When Cameron Diaz exploded onto the Hollywood scene in her first film, "The Mask," she immediately became a major 1990s bombshell. As such, you might expect that her first on-screen kiss was a "smokin" hot smooch, but in was actually a far more absurd and comedic one.
Our hero, Stanley Ipkiss (Jim Carrey), lies in bed, having a dream in which he is replaying a moment from earlier in the film, when he crossed paths with the beautiful lounge singer Tina (Diaz) outside the Coco Bongo nightclub. When it happened last time, Stanley didn't make the best impression. His suit was dirty, he stumbled over his words, and their conversation was interrupted when a valet showed up with Stanley's rental car, a rusted old heap.
But this time — in the dream — things are different. When Tina approaches Stanley, he's looking cool and smoking a cigarette. When the valet arrives with his car, it's a stylish white convertible. Stanley beckons Tina to come closer, and they wrap their arms around each other. She leans in to kiss him, lips parted, then grabs his head and turns it to the side, and she starts vigorously licking his ear, in a fashion so enthusiastic and sloppy that it's far weirder than it is sexy.
Stanley then wakes up, and discovers, much to his chagrin, that the only one actually licking his ear is his adorable dog, Milo. Better luck next time, Stan.
(New Line Cinema)Usually when a movie has a "will they, won't they" relationship in it, the audience is, for the most part, hoping that the two characters "will." "Back to the Future" is one of the few times in movie history where the film dangles the possibility of a romantic pairing in front of the audience and the intended reaction is for every person in the theater to hope and pray, with every ounce of their being, that they "won't."
In the film, cool '80s teen Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox) has accidentally gone back in time to 1955. Shortly after, he finds himself entangled in the lives of his now-teenage parents. The worst part of this is that his mother Lorraine ( Lea Thompson ) develops an enormous crush on him and starts doing everything she can to lock lips with this handsome stranger.
Lorraine finally gets her moment when Marty takes her out on a date as part of a rather convoluted plan to fix the broken timeline. Lorraine, oblivious to Marty's disinterest, leans in and kisses him, one of the most skin-crawlingly uncomfortable smooches in cinematic history. Fortunately, as she pulls back, it's clear that Lorraine didn't feel whatever she was hoping to feel. With sad resignation, she says. "When I kiss you, it's like I'm kissing ... my brother."
With that line, the film does an admirable job of diffusing the awkwardness of that particular moment — as much as that awkwardness can be diffused, that is — and for the rest of the story, Lorraine realizes that Marty is a much better friend than he is a boyfriend. Thank goodness.
(Universal Pictures)The 2007 ice skating bromance "Blades of Glory" is by no means an amazing film, but if you're a fan of Will Ferrell and Jon Heder, it's still worth a watch, as it does have its a fair share of disarmingly funny moments. One of the best comes when both comedy and kissing should both be deeply inappropriate, right after a dark and troubling revelation.
Skating prodigy Jimmy MacElroy (Heder) is going on a date with Katie Van Waldenberg ( Jenna Fischer ), the younger sister of his bitter skating rivals. Jimmy is eager to make his move, but in the meantime, the conversation has strayed toward their miserable childhoods, as both grew up in highly focused professional skating families. Jimmy recounts that all he got for his 10th birthday was "A six-pack of protein shakes and a subscription to Men's Health." Kate replies, "I didn't have a 10th birthday." The one-upmanship continues back and forth until finally, Katie casually recalls, "While driving me to skating practice, my parents were in a fatal accident. My brother and sister blame me for their death and they force me to work for them like a slave."
Now feeling that the moment is right, Jimmy makes his move, giving Katie a rather inept and fumbling kiss, but she doesn't seem to mind. After the two pull away, there is a momentary pause before Katie comments, "Wow, I never really thought of that as a romantic story before." Perfection.
(Paramount Pictures)The cult classic comedy "Wet Hot American Summer" follows a group of stupid horny teens at summer camp, among the stupidest and horniest of whom are a pair of camp counselors, Andy (Paul Rudd) and Lindsay (Elizabeth Banks). Though Andy is technically dating another counselor, Katie (Marguerite Moreau), that doesn't stop him and Lindsay from fooling around on a regular basis, including in one hilarious scene centered around a particularly lengthy kiss.
While Andy is sitting by the lake, on duty as a lifeguard, Lindsay decides to help him pass the time with a little smooching. The two make out as only teens can — with tremendous zeal, minimal skill, and a comical amount of tongue. Then, a nearby boy named Bobby (Benjamin Coppola) begins to flail about, seemingly unable to swim. He calls out for help, but Andy ignores him, saying, "Cut it out, Bobby. You're fine." We don't see what happens to Bobby after that, but later in the film, one of the kids asks Andy, "Have you seen my swimming buddy?" and Andy does his best to dodge the question, so we can assume things probably didn't end well.
It's dark as hell, but the film is also so fast-paced and outrageously unreal that it ends up being, more than anything, just another bit of absurdity.
(USA Films)"Pee-wee's Big Adventure" is a generally beloved film, and that's somewhat of a small miracle, given how inexplicably strange it is. The 1988 sequel, "Big Top Pee-wee," got a far chillier reception from critics, who mostly agreed that this time, the filmmakers couldn't reproduce whatever anomalous alchemy lead to the first film's peculiar charm. Most agree that the worst sin of "Big Top" is that, quite simply, they made Pee-wee way too horny. So horny, in fact, that he finds himself at the center of a love triangle, and given his otherwise childlike personality, this is downright creepy at times. No moment in the film better demonstrates this disastrous miscalculation than a scene that features a certain infamously terrible cinematic snog.
When the film opens, Pee-wee (Paul Reubens) is engaged to a sweet young schoolteacher, Winnie (Penelope Ann Miller). He then meets the trapeze artist Gina (Valeria Golino) and is immediately smitten with her. For some unknowable reason, she returns his affections, which leads to the two of them lying by a stream in each other's arms, watching a circus elephant bathe. They kiss, orchestral music swells, and as the camera slowly pulls back, we get almost two full minutes of Pee-wee and Gina silently locking lips, bathed in the golden afternoon light. Finally, mercifully, they are interrupted when Winnie arrives at the scene and scolds our dopey protagonist for his infidelity.
It's certainly a scene that will make many audiences laugh, but given that it's played totally straight, and given that most scenes in this film just don't work at all, comedically or dramatically, it's sort of unclear if the interminable length of the kiss is supposed to be a joke or not. It's probably a joke, but who can say for certain?
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Read the original article on Looper .
(Paramount Pictures)Kiss Scenes That Were More Hilarious Than Romantic
Comedy is all about subverting expectations. The more established and predictable a movie cliche is, the riper it is for comedic subversion. That's why it's strange that, though kissing is ubiquitous throughout cinema, and even though there's an entire genre of film known as "romantic comedies," actually funny kisses — as in, kisses that are the punchline to a joke — aren't nearly as common as you'd think. Of course, they still happen — and oddly enough, a few of the same actors keep popping up in the funniest ones.
Here are our picks for the funniest kisses in film, whether these are kisses that happen at the worst possible moment, kisses between people who shouldn't be kissing in the first place, or kisses that go disastrously wrong. Mostly, we'll be covering smooches that are intentionally comedic, but there will also be some instances where we think the kiss may have been intended to be genuinely moving but ended up being totally laughable instead.
Read more: Actors Who Got Grossed Out Kissing Their Co-Star On Screen
(Columbia Pictures)From "Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle" to "Dumb and Dumber," some of the best kisses in comedy films come in scenes that were more hilarious than romantic.
