21 Heartbroken People Revealed The Moment That Made Them Rethink Their Entire Friendship With Someone

We recently asked BuzzFeed Community members, "Have you ever learned that one of your friends was not actually the person you thought they were?" Additionally, we came across this Reddit thread from Angie-santiago that asked , "What is the worst thing a friend told you that made you rethink your friendship?"

So, we compiled some of the most shocking stories from both sources that highlight the harsh realities of friendship betrayal. Buckle up:

1. "'I don't feel like I should have to re-arrange my schedule just because you're in town.' I moved a couple of hours away, but would come back for two or three days every other month for work. She would text to say how much she missed me and that she'd love to get together for dinner or a drink the next time I was around. I would give her a week or more's notice when I would be there, but she would be busy with other plans. I finally called her on it, and that was her response. Needless to say, I don't bother her with my travel plans anymore."

— kadyg

2. "Had a HORRIBLE asthma attack years ago, unprovoked after a decade of respiratory stability. My roommate/friend offered to call an ambulance, and I breathlessly nodded yes with my hands on my heart. He did so, and as it pulled up to save my life, he went, 'Am I gonna have to do this EVERY weekend for you?!' He was dead serious and shaking with rage. All the dude did was make a phone call and open the door for the paramedics."

— Old_Refrigerator6943

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3. "One friend told me I was not bringing enough quality people into his life. Which begged the question of why he couldn't bring quality people into his life himself. Insulting."

— TillikumWasFramed

4. "We were out for drinks, celebrating her finishing her master's degree. Her boyfriend of three years, who had stepped up and covered the bulk of their rent and living expenses so she could study full time, couldn't make it to the dinner. She got a little tipsy and casually mentioned that she was moving out and breaking up with him the following week. When I asked her what happened, she just laughed and said, 'Nothing, I've just been planning it since I started the program. I just needed someone to cover the bills while I was in school so I wouldn't have to take out loans.' She framed it as some sort of empowering, strategic life hack and genuinely expected me to be proud of her."

"He was an incredibly sweet guy who had just told my husband he was looking at engagement rings. The complete lack of empathy and the way she smiled about systematically using a human being for three years made my stomach drop. I couldn't look at her the same way after that, and I completely cut contact a few weeks later."

— svyatolyubakrotevich

5. "I was going through a really dark time after a loss, and when I tried to open up, they said: 'Can you speed this up? Your depression is honestly becoming a bit of a buzzkill for the rest of the group.' That was the moment I realized they didn't want a friend, they just wanted an unpaid entertainer."

— ActOld1506

6. "'If I think someone is my soulmate, I'm not going just to ignore him because he's dating one of my friends. If we connect and we're meant to be, I'm going for it.' Later that year, she convinced a guy to break up with me and date her instead."

— Walmartian_Beta

7. "They said, 'Say what you want about Trump, but at least he's the most honest president we've ever had.' I. WAS. FLOORED."

— HeyKidsItIsMatt

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8. "Every couple of days, she'd switch from being my best friend to hating me. During a hating phase, I asked her, 'Why don't you like me?' to which she responded, 'I can't tell you.' I pretty much assumed at that point she either didn't care about me enough to fix our issue, or she never had one and was just trying to **** me off and hurt me. Thank god we are not friends anymore."

— Salty-Crocs

9. "He told me how normal it is for him to make AI **** of his female friends because nobody was getting hurt. I told him it hurts me (being a female friend). He tried to convince me that it wasn't weird."

— WittyBonkah

10. "She was living with me because she needed help, as her ex kicked her out. I told her my one condition was not to talk with my family about my personal stuff if they ever come to visit (I have a bad relationship with my mom and brother). I had to leave the country for work for a few months, and my family also had to stay at my house while I was away. I had time to present them to each other before I left, and then I found out all she did while I was away was, in fact, talk about me. They learned about stuff that I told her in confidence — nothing bad, I just don't involve my family at all with my personal matters, and she knew that and how it made me anxious to have them meet any of my friends. I just completely stopped talking to her; she moved out before I came back to my house."

"The story she tells people is that she thinks I had a crush on her, and since she didn't reciprocate, that is why I probably stopped talking to her. Looking back, she was a pretty ****** friend; she found ways to put me down, and I didn't even notice. I noticed she blocked me on her new Instagram after she got a new boyfriend. I think she knew what she did, but will never admit she was wrong, and was afraid I might spill her own secrets to her new boyfriend, just like she did not respect my privacy."

— Prestam0

11. "After she got married, she told me she didn't have time for me since I wasn't married. She said that if I had a kid, she'd have time for me. I was there for her for years prior. After my dad died and I needed to clean out his house, deal with abusive, greedy relatives, and was physically assaulted at the funeral, she got mad that her husband and family helped me. She stayed in the car and kept complaining that it was taking too long."

—Anonymous

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12. "She had an affair with a guy I liked and used me as a reason to spend time with him. He's a **** person also for doing this to me. After my dad died — she had met him — she didn't ask how I was when I saw her. She asked how a mutual acquaintance was since her husband died a month before my dad did. I confronted her about this. She said something like, 'Yeah, but it's her husband, and it's your dad. Hers is more serious.' Told her off, walked away, and haven't spoken to her since."

—Anonymous

13. "She told me she can feel the vibrations that come off me following my COVID vaccination because she was hypersensitive, and that she can sense it on anyone who has been vaccinated. Didn't believe in masks either. Sorry, but there is simply no way we will be able to bridge that gap between our worldviews. I can respect other people's opinions, and I do wish her all the best, but I do not have time or patience to entertain pseudoscientific ideas."

— AcceptablePeach6465

14. "I was driving a friend home in high school. It was the start of our last year. She told me halfway through the drive, 'I don't want to be friends with you after high school, but we're good right now.' We were not good after that."

— Lehmit-Cat

15. "He didn't attend my dad's funeral because his girlfriend was having a party. My parents, his parents, and he and I were all close. We've known each other for over 25 years."

—Anonymous

16. "When I was in the ER, she made it all about her. I wasn't expected to live through the night per the ER doc. I made her leave. Thank god I survived. I was transferred to another hospital and to the ICU, then to the recovery floor. Again, it was all about her. I was on medical leave after being discharged and had a lot of appointments, was on oxygen 24/7, and was really weak. Getting ready and dressed took a lot of energy. She called me lazy for resting and taking a nap. My body and I needed to heal, and rest was important. I told her not to call late or early. She didn't respect that. She asked me for money and to watch her kid since I 'wasn't doing anything anyway.' She didn't offer to drive me to appointments, help me get around, or get groceries, etc. Thank god for my neighbor friend! She checked on me daily, brought me food, helped me get outside and in the fresh air, and took me to appointments."

—Anonymous

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17. "'You're being cruel and hateful to me when I need you.' They were in the middle of a several-month-long episode in which they nearly stalked their ex. Why was I cruel? I told them to leave him alone because he had asked them to, and I refused to feed them any info on how he was doing or pass messages."

— Survivng_Hellscapes

18. "I told her about a huge promotion, and her first response was, 'Must be nice to be lucky.' She couldn't just be happy for me for five seconds."

— Suspicious_Stick_299

19. "I love animals of all kinds, and I went for a walk with my friend. Found a very cute salamander on the trail, and I was so excited! She proceeded to put her shoe over it, saying that it's ugly, so it deserves to die. I had to physically stop her from killing it. She was studying to be a nurse at the time."

— faitharooo

20. "I had lived with her for five years. I was happily single the entire time. We did tons of stuff together — camping, shopping, concerts, traveling, etc. She'd even met my family. I met my now husband, and she turned on me like I was in a nightmare. She kicked me out one night after getting blacked out drunk and tried to get me arrested. Six weeks later, she called and tried to act as if nothing had happened."

—Anonymous

21. And: "I found out after years of friendship that my 'best friend' was lying the entire time, including about having cancer, and they catfished me on Instagram. She told me she had cancer the day we met, and I went out of my way to do things for her, including helping her financially at times. Funny, she never asked for a ride to a doctor's appointment or pharmacy. She said she still had her long hair because of certain treatments and could drink alcohol (to excess) when they switched her meds, etc. I didn't want to be rude and pry about her health, so I let these red flags slide."

"A mutual friend noticed that those Instagram accounts didn't have pictures of themselves and only talked about how great my former best friend was. One weekend, she backed out of a group Vegas trip (that I had already paid for) at the last minute and expected me to do the same. I got several messages from said fake accounts, angry that I didn't cancel my plans and stay with her. I sent one reply saying we know who this really is. She called immediately and fessed up to the fake accounts. It turned out that the cancer was a lie, too. She said I should have known about the lies because Catfish is her favorite show, and I should just get over it. My grandmother prayed for your fake cancer for years. Nope, we're done."

—Female, 37, Los Angeles

What was the breaking point that made you rethink a friendship? Tell us in the comments or share anonymously using this form.

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