I'm having a bad day. I cannot tell how I used my time today. I could have done many things to do if I moved myself, but I didn't. I should have done those things. I'd like to have a good day. I always have guilty feeling to my time, my parents, my life and myself. I'd like to remove presence of pain, aching heart, edema etc... Today I had to go to the hospital in Ochanomizu. I should get my treatment information from my doctor for tomorrow. Hopelessly behind my schedule... holy moly... I should get well asap.