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2012.07.13
カテゴリ： カテゴリ未分類
As I walked to the train station, First day of work, or should I say going to training my Japan... my one thought was that "jumping is an option"
as in Jumping into the train.
I've never wanted to jump in to a train it seems to painful and too messy. But for some reason that moment, over a week ago when I walked to the station i thought that "it is an option"
Not a solution but an option.
I've been in Japan now for almost 14 days... Living with my best friend is starting to wear me down.. I have my own place now but I haven't had the time to fully move in yet. Tomorrow I hope to, and honestly need to move into my own place. I'm not good at this living with people thing and well .. it really is getting to me.
I feel so alone.
So, so, alone.
I don't have friends that I can randomly chat too.
I don't have anyone that wants to talk to me.. that is happy to see me.
I screwed up somewhere in my Karma wheel on potential loves... It was because of how mean and horrible a person I was to C... it fcking sucks.
I feel so broken.. I feel so hollow.
I'm in a brand new city but I feel so stuck in the past..
I really need to just let go, and let the past be the past.. be only me in this moment..
So much easier said than done....
on a night like this... i just need someone to talk to. but no one is here.... sigh.
as in Jumping into the train.
I've never wanted to jump in to a train it seems to painful and too messy. But for some reason that moment, over a week ago when I walked to the station i thought that "it is an option"
Not a solution but an option.
I've been in Japan now for almost 14 days... Living with my best friend is starting to wear me down.. I have my own place now but I haven't had the time to fully move in yet. Tomorrow I hope to, and honestly need to move into my own place. I'm not good at this living with people thing and well .. it really is getting to me.
I feel so alone.
So, so, alone.
I don't have friends that I can randomly chat too.
I don't have anyone that wants to talk to me.. that is happy to see me.
I screwed up somewhere in my Karma wheel on potential loves... It was because of how mean and horrible a person I was to C... it fcking sucks.
I feel so broken.. I feel so hollow.
I'm in a brand new city but I feel so stuck in the past..
I really need to just let go, and let the past be the past.. be only me in this moment..
So much easier said than done....
on a night like this... i just need someone to talk to. but no one is here.... sigh.
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